Sexy Summer Saturday - 6/30 - Love me by Bella Andre

Sexy Summer Saturdays is a weekly post that Attack the Stacks, Hackaroos Reviews, Sims-Sational Books, The Autumn Review, and The Bookish Babe created for fun, to spread the word about sizzling summer reads. 


This is a little diddy where we all review erotica-ish books on Saturday. Yes kiddies! I said Erotica, so read no further if you are a young'in.

GoodReads Description

It's been five years since Lily and Travis fell in love in TAKE ME....now it's finally time for Janica and Luke to get their very own happy ending. 

If there's one thing that Janica Ellis is absolutely certain of, it's that she and Luke Carson are totally wrong for each other. She's a wild, artistic and outspoken fashion designer. He's a type A, workaholic trauma surgeon (who just happens to be sizzling hot and her brother-in-law!). But Janica is about to be proven wrong when opposites attract...in the sexiest possible way.

After a life-changing night in the ER, Luke is desperate for escape - and relief from his personal demons. For five years he has fought his attraction to his sister-in-law, but when he's pushed too far, he can't fight it another second. He needs her. Desperately. He's spent his whole life doing the right thing. For one night, he's going to follow desire instead. Straight into Janica's arms.

Janica can't believe Luke is finally at her front door...and that he's kissing her like he's been waiting his whole life for her. But even as their sensual connection deepens with every touch of skin on skin - and the man she always thought was such a good boy turns out to be sinfully, toe-curlingly bad between the sheets - Janica soon realizes she wants more than Luke's body. She wants his heart too. But what will Luke do when one night of extreme passion turns into an all or nothing proposition? 

I had a ton of fun reading this with Jess this week. We were feeling jealous because Autumn and Andrea always read their sexies together, so we decided to read ours together too. Which works out great, because as far as Erotica goes, Jess and I are always on the same page.

This week we read Love Me by Bella Andre. I have to say it was pretty good. I can't say I loved the characters.. but they were likable enough. What I really liked about this book was the story. Yeah, the story was a little corny, but it was a story. Not just sex. I love me a swoony sex scene, but PLOT! Plot is nice and this one had it. :)

There was one scene that the dialogue was just laughable. I won't spoil, but imagine a bunch of little kids on a playground fighting over a slightly used but not yet destroyed toy. Too funny. Jess and I, we LOL'd a little.

That wasn't the best thing though... let me tell you a little about Luke...

Here is Luke's Penis

Here is Luke's penis in comparison to a house. 

Yup, he has a big juicy cock! This thing is Mammoth. You could probably support a deck on that shit. And Luke is sooo impressed that Janica can take him completely into her hilt! Yes, her hilt. I couldn't help but imagine her fucking one of these the whole time.

Seriously though, I don't understand how that's impressive. I certainly wouldn't be happy if I were a guy and my girls vagina could suck up my totem pole like it's a straw. I expressed this to Jess via text..

How would you like some funny quotes? Yes??? I thought so.


-He pointed to the wooden slats in front of his boots and pulled down his zipper. “Get on your Knees.” - yeah bitch! Lol

-She saw the most beautiful erection in the world. He was so thick. And so wide. And so long

-He was right there, about to shoot his load into the most beautiful woman he had ever known. - Bahahah! I once saw the nicest pot of flowers at lowes, I was tempted to do the same.

Last I checked, Love me is free on Amazon. Which is cool. I did enjoy this one so I looked to see what else miss Andre has written. Low and behold there is a story about her Janica's sister. I realized now that this is actually book two. Woops. So I thought, I should buy the other one and do it for my next sss. I wont yet though. Because of this.

I'm not against spending money on books. Don’t get me wrong, but it annoys me when I see paper back is cheaper. I will probably get a lot of slack for that, but it's just how I feel. *ducks for cover*


Over all, it was a cute sexy read.. If you like large dick, then check this one out! :) 


AMAZON

Excerpt - Dante's Girl by Courtney Cole

I have spent every summer since I was ten years old with my father in London.  Every summer, since I was ten years old, has been uneventful and boring. 

Until this year.

And this year, after a freak volcanic eruption strands me far from home, I have learned these things:

1.  I can make do with one outfit for three days before I buy new clothes.  

2.  If I hear the phrase, “You’re not in Kansas anymore, Toto,” even one more time, I might become a homicidal maniac.

3.  I am horribly and embarrassingly allergic to jellyfish.

4. I am in love with Dante Giliberti, who just happens to be the beautiful, sophisticated son of the Prime Minister of a Mediterranean paradise. 

5.  See number four above.  Because it brings with it a whole slew  of problems and I’ve learned something from every one of them.

Let’s start with the fact that Dante’s world is five light-years away from mine.  He goes to black-tie functions and knows the Prime Minister of England on a first name basis.  I was born and raised on a farm in Kansas and wear cut-off jeans paired with cowboy boots.  See the difference?

But hearts don’t care about differences.  Hearts want what they want.  And mine just wants to be Dante’s girl. 

My heart just might be crazy.

Today I have a fun excerpt for you all! I read Dante's girl over this passed weekend, and all I can say is it's super cute. Obviously I'll have more to say when I review it, but until then, we will just go with cute. :o)

Excerpt Time!!

Dante’s Girl by Courtney Cole
Chapter One

It is impossible to look hot in the dingy fluorescent light of an airport bathroom. Or as my best friend Becca would say, hawt.
At this particular moment, I’m not hot or hawt.  I make this revelation as I vigorously scrub at my arms and face and then use a wet paper towel under my pits.
And what is it about peeing in an airport toilet ten times in a day that makes you feel so completely scummy?  I glance around at the crumpled tissues strewn about on the scuffed floor and the dirty toilets peeking from behind half-closed doors and cringe.  That answer is clearly ‘because of the germs’. Ack.
Trying not to think about it, I clean up the best I can.  After running a brush through my hair, I stick a piece of gum in my mouth, apply a thin layer of lip gloss and call it good.  I glance into the mirror and cringe.  It isn’t good enough, but it will have to do.  Very soon, I’ll put this dreadful four hour layover in Amsterdam behind me and before I even know it, I’ll be in London.
With my father.
For the summer.
It would be torture.
Just shoot me now.
And it’s not because I don’t love him, because I do.  My reluctance doesn’t stem from lack of love.  It comes from the deep-seeded fact that Alexander Ellis doesn’t understand me.  He never has and he never will. It’s something that I’ve made my peace with and I’m not angry about it.
I’m his only child and he works his life away as some top-secret agent for the NSA.  His job is so secret that I don’t even know what he does. In my head, I imagine him jumping from helicopters and saving starving children in war torn areas.  But in reality, I know he probably sits behind a desk and analyzes information from a satellite stream or a taped telephone conversation. I’m pretty sure that’s what the NSA does, anyway.  They aren’t the cool kind of spies.
Also, he isn’t exactly sure what to do with a daughter.  I was supposed to have been a boy. Seventeen years ago, sonograms apparently weren’t as absolute as they are today, because the technician told my parents that she was 99.9% sure that I was a boy.  They painted my nursery blue and picked out my name and everything.  I can only imagine the shocked horror on my father’s face when I was born with lady parts.
Regardless, I know he loves me.  Even though he had willingly given my mother full custody when they divorced years ago, I know he only did it because he works overseas so much and he isn’t exactly sure how to raise a girl.  He does okay.  But then again, I do have some reason to believe that he still pretends that I’m a boy, just to make it easier on himself.  It’s fairly easy to do since I still have the boy name that they originally picked out.
With my head down, I trudge back out into the congested halls of Schiphol airport.  Weary travelers bustle around me and I shift my bags so that I can pull the stubborn strap of my tank top back over my shoulder where it belongs.  As I do, I crash into someone with enough force that my bags go flying out of my hands and scatter onto the ground under people’s feet.
“Son of a –“ I blurt before I even think.
“Buck?” a male voice offers helpfully.
Looking up, I stare into the most unique and beautiful shade of blue that a pair of eyes has ever possessed. Of that I am certain.  Blue just shouldn’t be that multi-faceted and twinkling.  There should be a law or something.
Or at least a warning label:
Caution, these eyes may cause female knees to tremble.
Before I can help it, I scan the rest of him.  Sweet Mary.  This guy had lucked out in the gene department.  Tall, slender, beautiful.  Honey colored hair that had natural highlights that could even catch the crappy airport light, broad shoulders, slim hips, long legs.  He is tan and golden with a bright, white smile.
I am surely staring at Apollo, the god of the sun.  Probably with my mouth hanging open, which makes me realize that I must look like an idiot- the personification of what foreigners think Americans to be.  I snap my mouth closed.
“I’m sorry,” I say quickly, trying to still my racing heart.  “Did I run into you?”
“Only a bit,” Apollo says gentlemanly, with a shrug of his strong shoulders.  I can tell he is strong even through his shirt sleeves, which are snug across his toned biceps.  Sweet baby monkeys.
“How can someone run into someone else only by a bit?” I ask with a nervous smile as I kneel to retrieve my stuff.
Please don’t let him smell me right now, I silently pray to any god who cares to listen. I am sure that at this point in my travels, I probably smell like soiled hamster bedding.
He bends next to me and picks up the contents of my spilled purse. He smells like sunshine.  And rain.  And everything beautiful that I can think of.  I try not to cringe as his fingers grasp a tampon and slide it back inside my bag.  He doesn’t even flinch, he just casually continues to pick up my things like he’s used to handling feminine hygiene products.
“Oh, it’s fairly easy, really,” he answers.  He has an exotic sounding accent that I can’t place.  “At least, when you’re not looking where you’re going.”  My head snaps up and he laughs.
“I’m kidding,” he assures me as he extends an arm to me. Even his hand is graceful.  I gulp as his fingers curl around mine.  “You can bump into me any time you’d like.”
“Thanks,” I mumble.  “I think.”
“I’m Dante,” he tells me, his impossibly blue eyes still twinkling.
“I’m Reece,” I answer with a sigh, already anticipating his reaction. “Yes, I know it’s a boy’s name.”
“You’re not a boy,” Dante observes.  “Most definitely not a boy.”
Is that a note of appreciation in his voice?  Surely not. I look like a bedraggled Shih Tzu.
“No, I’m not,” I agree.  “I just don’t know that my dad ever got that memo.”
I look past Dante and find that he is alone.  He seems to be about my age so that’s a little unusual in these circumstances.  My parents had flown me as an ‘unaccompanied minor’ across the ocean for years, but other people’s parents are usually a little squeamish about that.
“I’m sure that fact hasn’t escaped him,” Dante tells me in amusement.  Why do his eyes have to sparkle so much?   I usually go for brown-eyed guys.  But this boy is most certainly making me re-think that stance.
“That’s debatable,” I sigh.  Realizing that we are impeding the busy pedestrian traffic like a dam in a rushing river, I smile.
“Thank you very much for helping me pick up my things.  Safe travels!”
I turn on my heel and pivot, walking quickly and what I hope is confidently in the other direction.  Hitching my heavy purse up on my shoulder, I fight the urge to turn and look at him.  Something about him is practically mesmerizing.
But I don’t look.  I keep walking, one foot in front of the other.  When I reach the moving walkway, I hop on and focus ahead of me, eyes straight forward.
Don’t look back.
Don’t look back.
Don’t look back.
Regardless of my silent chanting, when I step from the walkway I discreetly check behind me.  Apollo is nowhere to be seen.  With a sigh, I continue on to the British Airways terminal.  Only three short hours left until take-off.  Plugging my earbuds into my ears, I settle into a seat and close my eyes.

* * *

“Excuse me, Reece?”
Before I even open my eyes, I know the sexy accent is coming from Apollo.  I can feel his epic hotness emanating through my eyelids.  I only hope that I haven’t been drooling in my sleep.
“Yes?” I ask as nonchalantly as I can while my eyes pop open.  I try to discreetly smooth my hair down. In my head, I envision myself as Chewbacca from Star Wars and wince.
Dante hands me my phone, which must’ve fallen from my lap as I napped.
“Are you on the flight to London?” he grins.  “They’re boarding priority travelers now.  I just thought you should know.”
Yikes. I had slept for three hours?  In a noisy airport?  I must have been super tired.
“Thank you,” I reply quickly, gathering my things in a rush. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.  I’m not a priority traveler, but I probably would have slept through general boarding.  Thank you for waking me.”
I glance at him as I stand up and can’t help but do a double take.  It isn’t easy to get used to his particular brand of sexy.  He is laid-back, handsome and casual, which is a formula for utter female devastation.  The impossible thing is that he doesn’t seem to realize it. He’s effortlessly sophisticated and chic.
“Well, you’re awake now and that’s the important thing. Have a nice trip, Reece,” Dante grins once more before he joins a group of men who are apparently waiting for him.  I was wrong, I guess.  He isn’t alone after all.  The men close around him in a tight circle and they board the plane with the other passengers with first class tickets.
He’s on my flight.
I gulp and find a place in line with the other travelers flying coach.
As the richer, better-dressed passengers file past us, I feel a little like a bumpkin in rumpled clothing.  Even though I travel to London every summer to visit my dad, I live in rural America the rest of the year. And all of a sudden, I feel like I am wearing a blinking neon sign proclaiming that very fact.  The clothing that had seemed sophisticated to travel in this morning now seems like it was hand-made in someone’s backwoods shed.
And it so makes sense that Apollo is in first class.  He smells like a beautiful sunrise in a wooded meadow. Oh, my gosh.  What is wrong with me? Where did that come from?  I am totally being as corny as an erectile dysfunction commercial.
I roll my eyes at my own absurdity and hand my ticket to the heavily made-up flight attendant who is waiting to take it.  She glances at it and then at me before she stamps my passport and hands it back.
“Have a nice flight, Miss Ellis,” she tells me before turning her attention to the passenger behind me.
Yeah, right.
I like flying almost as much as I like having dental work.  Or having my fingernails pulled out one by one.  Or having paper cuts sliced onto my legs and then lemon juice poured onto them.  Just about that much.
Filing down the narrow aisle through first class, I can’t help but search out Apollo.  It doesn’t take long to find him.  He is situated by the window in a wide, leather first-class seat.  He’s already covered in a warm blanket and looks like he is settling in for the hour long flight.  As I move closer to him, his eyes pop open and meet mine, the electric blue of his almost causing me to gasp aloud.
He smiles slightly as I pass and his gaze doesn’t waver from mine.
I find myself wishing that I could sit next to him.  Not only because of the lavish first class seats, although those would be nice too.
But rather, there is something in the air between Dante and me.  I can feel it, an instant connection.  I can practically reach out and touch it.  I’ve never experienced chemistry like this in my life. It’s the kind that seems corny when you read about it in books, but in real life, it is anything but. It is simply electrifying.  Ripping my eyes from his, I continue down the aisle and find my seat.
Taking a deep breath, I stash my carry-on in the overhead bin and slump into the window seat, trying not to hyperventilate as my fear of flying suddenly overwhelms me while the cramped airplane closes in around me.
Deep breath in.
Deep breath out.
Repeat.
I watch the flight crew below me loading the bags into the belly of the plane.  What if they dislodge the landing gear while they are messing around down there?  What if they don’t check the systems well enough and we die in a fiery crash?  What if the metal holding the plane together rips off in the air and peels away like tissue paper?
Deep breath in.
Deep breath out.
Repeat.
I might die.
Seriously.
I listen impatiently as the flight attendants give their safety spiel and motion toward the exits like they are NFL referees with dumb tiny scarves around their necks.  I just need for them to get on with it.  Just let us taxi out and take-off and then I will be perfectly fine once we are in the air.  My hands get clammy and my ears start to roar.  Why am I such a freak?
Deep breath in.
Deep breath out.
Repeat.
You freaking flight attendants.
Hurry.
Up.
I’m just getting ready to shove my earbuds back in to distract myself when Dante appears next to me like a savior or an angel or something of equal beauty and importance.
“Is this seat taken?” he smiles and I notice a dimple in his right cheek that I hadn’t noticed before.  How had I missed a dimple?
“Um, not that I know of,” I answer weakly, trying not to die from heart palpations.  “But the seat belt sign is on. You’re not supposed to be out of your seat.”
Fabulous. Now I sound like a hall monitor with a heart problem.
Dante shrugs without seeming worried.
“I think it will be okay,” he answers.  “We’re not even on the runway yet.”
“Good point.”
“Can I sit here?  I’m bored up front.”
I nod, my palms instantly clammier.  “I hope you brought your blanket.  You won’t get much back here except for a bag of peanuts.”
And now I sound like a cheap hall monitor with a heart problem. I’m presenting myself better and better by the moment.
Dante smiles yet again and sits next to me.  He brings his charming accent with him and the scent of his amazing cologne.  I take a deep breath.  He smells far better than the stale airplane air.  Far better.  I fight the urge to jump into his lap and inhale his neck, a maneuver that just might make me appear slightly insane.
“You look pretty pale,” he observes as he buckles up. “Are you afraid to fly?”
“Is it that obvious?” I ask quietly.  “As much as I’ve flown in my lifetime, I should be used to it.  But I’m afraid that’s never going to happen.  Once I’m in the air for awhile, I’ll be fine, but until then… well, I’m terrified. I admit it.”
“Don’t worry,” Dante tells me quietly, his voice calm and reassuring.  “There’s nothing to be afraid of.  You’re more likely to get into a--”
“Car crash rather than die in a plane crash,” I interrupt.  “Yes, I know. I’ve heard.  Where are you from?” I ask curiously, half out of genuine curiosity and half out of the need to distract myself.  “You have the most interesting accent.”
He smiles, his teeth brilliantly white.  I decide on the spot that I could watch him smile all day long.
“Caberra,” he answers, reminding me that I had asked a question.  “It’s an island near Greece.  And you?”
“Like you don’t know that I’m American,” I chuckle.  “I know it’s written all over me.  I’m sure you’re a fan, right?”
“Of Americans?” he raises a golden eyebrow.  “Of course. I love them.  I have no reason not to.  They bring a lot of tourist dollars to Caberra.”
“Well, we are a land of excess,” I admit.  “But that’s usually what foreigners seem to hate about us.”
Dante stares at me for a moment and then smiles.  “Well, I can’t speak for all foreigners, but I don’t hate Americans.  And you’re not in America right now, are you?”
I shake my head.  “No, I am most certainly not.”
“Well, then.  You’re the foreigner now.”  He grins and I can’t help but smile back.  He has a point.
The pilot gets on the intercom and his nasally voice drones on and on, but I am able to tune it out as I engage in conversation with a boy who is surely a direct descendent of the gods.  There is no other plausible explanation for his good looks or charm. I barely even hear the words that come out of Dante’s mouth, because I am so mesmerized by the shape of his lips as he moves them.  Pathetic, I know, but true.
One thing about me:  I don’t lie to myself.  I might stretch the truth for my parents from time to time when necessary, but never to myself. And I’m pathetically fascinated by this boy.
Finally, the aircraft shudders a bit and noses forward and I startle, gripping the arms of my seat. My fingers turn white and I am certain that I am leaving permanent indentions in the cracked vinyl arm-rests.
“Don’t worry,” Dante says quietly, unpeeling one of my hands and grasping it within his own.  “It will be fine.”
The feel of his hand distracts me.  Strong and warm, it cups my own carefully, like he is holding something very fragile.  I close my eyes and enjoy the feeling. I only have a couple of minutes to soak it in, however.
As the plane moves down the runway in preparation for take-off, something happens.  Something isn’t right.
Our plane rocks a little, then quivers, like it is being moved by a strong gust of wind.  I feel it a brief moment before Dante tightens his grip on my hand, a split second before light explodes from outside of my eyelids.  I open them to discover fire tearing down the runway past my window.  Before I can react or even scream, all hell breaks loose.

Here is some Author info for you, and Dante's Girl is now live on Amazon <----- click me!

Courtney Cole, Author

The Bloodstone Saga

The Moonstone Saga

The American Princess series 

The Minaldi Legacy (Coming Soon) 

www.courtneycolewrites.com

Follow me on Twitter!

Friend me on Facebook!

Find me on Goodreads!

See my books on Amazon  

Review - Promise me a Rainbow by Cheryl Reavis

GoodReads Description

Deserted by her husband because she couldn’t have children, Catherine Holben has thrown herself into her job counseling pregnant teens. Catherine is still recovering from the pain of her divorce, but her life is changed forever when she makes a purchase in a quaint curio shop. She meets handsome, hardworking Joe D’Amaro, a widower and father of three, and his daughter, Fritz. But Joe needs help with Fritz, a seven-year-old dynamo. She’s a precocious but headstrong little girl who’s impossible to resist., and he is too proud to admit it.

Joe and Catherine are cautious about making a commitment to each other. They both know the joy and heartache of falling in love, but are they willing to risk being together despite their misgivings? Neither can ignore the love that quickly blossoms between them. Maybe they can have a wonderful life together . . . if only Joe’s still-grieving older daughter, Della, will accept a new woman in her father’s life.

True love versus reality. Can Catherine handle his ready-made family? Or is there more in store for her than she thinks?

When I first saw Promise Me a Rainbow on NetGalley, I was a little hesitant to request it. I haven’t been reading much adult contemporary lately, but this sounded like something I would enjoy, and I did! 

Catherine Holben is awesome. Her ex husband Jonathan is a complete douche bag though. You see, he leaves because she can’t have children. Let me tell you from experience, when I was at a point in my life where I thought I might not be able to have a healthy child, it nearly destroyed me. Had my husband not been there supporting me, and pulling me back from the dark hole I was in, I don’t know where I would be today. So this pompous fool pissed me off to no end. Catherine was strong though. Still dealing with the hurt, naturally, but with her head held high. I admired her character very much.

Enter Joseph D’Amaro… through the purchase of a silly gnome, Catherine and Joseph’s world collides, and what a ride it is. Joseph, I like his character. I sympathized with the poor guy. Being a single dad to three can’t be easy. The story is told from his point of view at times, and his youngest daughters. They both have hella baggage, it was fun watching them sort through it all.

This is a pretty great story. I blew through it. Will Catherine and Joseph find happiness someday, well duh, but it won’t be a piece of cake. There is a lot in the way. I adored watching Catherine interact with Joseph’s children. Boy does that women know how to put a teen in her place! I have to say… I hated Margaret with a passion like no other. That woman boils my blood. I won’t tell you who she is… you just wait. Good thing she’s not real or I’d rip her hair out.

Over all, if you’re looking for a cute semi deep adult contemp, I recommend this one. I really liked it. So glad I decided to give it a try.


Amazon

Review- Total Blueprint for World Domination by Jolene Stockman

Goodreads Description

Target big dreams and build a plan to achieve them! You've got one life, one shot, and all the power to make it happen. Get ready to dream big and live big. It's all up to you. And it starts now.

Total Blueprint for World Domination (17,000 words) is a powerful life-planning book for teens that will inspire. The book lets readers:
*Explore hidden passions and find direction.
*Create heart-pounding, toe-tingling goals.
*Recruit an army for support.
*Design a dream world and make it happen.
*Achieve world domination step-by-step.

Full of tips and tricks for tackling life's challenges, Total Blueprint for World Domination is a book that will motivate readers to take their life to the next level.

Anything is possible. And anything is possible for you. Believe it. Total Blueprint for World Domination takes you from this very second to your greatest dreams. So, are you ready?

A while back, I was contacted by Jolene Stockman and asked to read and review Total Blueprint for World Domination. I was hesitant. This isn’t normally my thing, and I immediately turn down none fiction stuff, but the author was so sweet. I figured I would give it a try.

I actually enjoyed it! Not to sound like a jerk by saying it that way, but I didn’t think I would. It’s a fast read, and it’s pretty inspirational. Honestly, it’s not my groove. I don’t think I would dig reading this kind of motivational book on a regular basis, but I could see this really working out well for teachers. You know those speakers you would sit through back in school. You were just happy to get out of class, but it bored you to tears. This wasn’t boring. I think a high school class would benefit by following along with it. It’s interactive and personal. 

A dream is a dream, but when you write it all out on paper, it makes it more real. I never had big dreams growing up. My goals pretty much consisted of getting married and having a family. It didn’t matter what I did for a living, as long as I didn’t hate it. I didn’t need a blue print to get where I’m at, I’m pretty sure it was all luck anyway.

There are a ton of awesome quotes I’ll be sharing with you. One thing I adore about this, was the personal stories Jolene shares about her school and career choices. I don’t know the Author other than the few emails shared between us, but re-reading these quotes I highlighted, I can tell we share a lot of the same views on things.

“If you don’t love your life? Change it. Don’t accept anything that doesn’t make you glow with pride that it’s yours.”

Yes yes yes!!! In fact, I may post this on my facebook page later for all the whiners.

“You can see the crap in life, or you can see the cool. Happiness is a choice in every moment and you are in charge of that choice”

Do you see why I love this! So very true

“World domination means conquering the space around you, finding happiness in your everyday.”

“Oh, and sucky people? Lots of people straight out suck. You’ve probably met lots of them already, and you might even meet a whole lot more. Only one thing makes this okay. Sucky people can bring you closer to the world you want, by showing you the one you don’t want.”

Yeah, so suck on that negative nelly's!

I think if you are a teacher with a class of teens, or anyone who has goals in life but you don’t know where to start in reaching them. This might be the book for you. I personally enjoyed it and I’m neither.

AMAZON

Fifty Shades Darker - SIMS TRAILER!

Hey everyone!!! It's finally done! Just finished and uploaded last night. I have been working so hard on this one. Truth be told, I felt a ton of pressure with this one. When I started out making the first one, it was funny/haha - this will make my friends laugh and that will be the end of it. Boy was I wrong. On YouTube for only 2 months so far, it's at 37,583 views. That's crazy. It's been featured on a number of websites as well. I'm so honored. My SIL even called me last week to tell me they were discussing it on her local radio station. Really???!!!! - cray cray.

VH1.Com

Crushable.com

Movieline.com

Guyism.com

50shadesofgrey.com

And a few tumblr pages I believe. 

Anyway, I'm just utterly blown away. So thank you to everyone who encouraged me. I owe you all one! ;) 

Now on to Fifty Shades Darker. First I'll share a few snap shots.

And now for the big reveal. I have to say, mad props for YouTube on picking the perfect still shot. lol. I hope you all enjoy it!!!
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EDIT!


I realize now after a comment a received on YouTube, that the idiot I am added of's to the title. Go me. 714 views later, it's pointed out. So I will be fixing it and re-uploading. Which blows, but I look at it this way. There are a few parts that don't look as smooth as I would have liked, so I will take this chance to fix those sections as well! :) Until then, I will leave this version live. 

Sexy Summer Saturday 6/16 - Safe Haven by Shanna Germain

Sexy Summer Saturdays is a weekly post that Attack the Stacks, Hackaroos Reviews, Sims-Sational Books, The Autumn Review, and The Bookish Babe created for fun, to spread the word about sizzling summer reads. 


This is a little diddy where we all review erotica-ish books on Saturday. Yes kiddies! I said Erotica, so read no further if you are a young'in.

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Kallie Peters has finally made her dream come true – she’s turned the family farm into Safe Haven, an animal sanctuary. But financial woes are pressing in on her, and she’s worried that the only way to keep the farm is to allow her rich ex-boyfriend back into her life. When a sexy stranger shows up in her driveway with a wiggling puppy in his arms, she knows it’s her chance for a hot rendezvous before she gives up her freedom.

The sex is hot, wild and passionate – the perfect interim before returning to the pressures of real life – but something else is happening between them. Can they find a way to save their dreams, their passions and their hearts, or will they have to say goodbye to all they’ve come to love?
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This week I decided to read Safe Haven (Xcite Romance) by Shanna Germain. I searched through Amazon to find some free erotica titles and this was one of the gems I came across. I started with this one because of the – Xcite. The capital X drew me in and made me feel like I might be reading some real porn.

I thought this was a cute book. Short, sweet, and smothered in cheese. I liked that there was no crazy stuff. I was a little worried since it takes place on a rescue farm with horses. There is a lot that could go wrong quick in that kind of setting if you know what I mean.

Kallie, she was cool. I felt bad for her in the beginning, because she obvs needed some cobweb sweeping. That girl was hard up, and thank goodness she gets hers. I have to say for as short as this little number was; there was a ton of side stuff. I kept thinking, “Would you shut up and fuck already! Jeesh” Oh, and they did. Yes indeed!

“Kallie,’ he said again. ‘Come for me…’ And she couldn’t help it.”

Dude! What’s this with coming on demand? That drives me nuts. It’s like a going theme in erotica. If my man says, “hey! Go wipe your ass!” That I can do, but coming on demand? I mentioned my annoyance about this in my 50 shades review. I want to find a women out there who can do this! (excluding porn stars of course.)

Ooooo, here is a good one!

“He was making a sound of his own and she realized he was giggling. Between her legs. While he ate her out.”

WHAT! There are two things wrong with that. Guys who giggle are not hot. Stick me in a room with a gorgeous naked man, and if he giggles, I will walk the fuck out. No thank you.

Second thing… If I was being eaten out, and the eater starts laughing in any way, I’d be mortified. Thinking I had three lips or something. It’s rude to laugh with your mouth full.

This last quote, Omg, guys I laughed my ass off.

“When he finally got to the kitchen, she was sitting on the counter, her legs spread and hanging over the edge. “That doesn’t look like hot chocolate,’ he said. ‘Just as tasty.’ She grinned.

Um…. No! I’m a huge advocate for hot chocolate. Swiss Miss would be fucking appalled! I do not eat pussy, so maybe I have no say in this, but I did a little pole amongst males to see. In my opinion, there is no way snatch is tastier than Cocoa.

 A few of the responses

- It depends on the pussy
- Only  a girl would ask that
- It does when I add Marshmallow's
- Possibly the classiest post I have seen on FB  this week. Nice!

The majority say yes, that it is. So I just don’t know, I’m apparently missing out. I’m good with never knowing though. :o)

Overall, I gave this a 3 star on goodreads. I liked it for what it was. A cute little story with some steamy sex!

Cover Reveal and Song Release! Breathe - Abbi Glines

Okay, so Breathe already has a cover, but it has a new one now, and let me tell you, I absolutely adore it. :) I loved this book. It was my first Abbi Glines experience, and now I'm hooked on her stuff, forever. My Review of Breathe is here if you would like to read it. 


First I will show you the new cover! 

I made it a little big because I love it. Sadie looks just how I pictured her. Back in my emo pretend witch craft days I would make a shrines of scented candles and pray to the goddess or whoever that I would wake up looking similar to her the next morning. Needless to say, this never happened but I snagged myself a decent guy anyway. <--- this is no joke by the way. I was rather pathetic in my youth. 


Another Goody I have for you is the song release. Don't Cry. When or if you have read the book, you know this song by Jax. It plays a part in the story. 




Some other cool stuff, the Breath Playlist link! HERE

1. Can’t Take My Eyes Off You by Muse
2. Don’t Ever Let it End by Nickelback
3. Breathe by Taylor Swift
4. Holding on to Heaven by Nickelback
5. No Air by Jordan Sparks and Chris Brown
6. Here Without You by Three Doors Down
7. Lullaby by The Spill Canvas
8. Take My Breath Away by Jessica Simpson

Plus, Abbi's Dream cast. 

Sasha as Sadie

Max Irons as Jax

Chris Hemsworth as Marcus

If you would like to know more about Miss Abbi Glines and her amazing books check out her Website. ----> Click Me, you know you want to! I think that's just about everything, but really, if you haven't tried reading her stuff yet, you should. I'm not just saying that, I truly adore all of her stories and characters. :) 

Sexy Summer Saturdays 06/9 - Party of Three by Daire St. Denis

Sexy Summer Saturdays is a weekly post that Attack the Stacks,Hackaroos Reviews, Sims-Sational Books, The Autumn Review, and The Bookish Babe created for fun, to spread the word about sizzling summer reads. 

Party of Three

by St Denis, Diare

Pub - Carina Press

Pub Date - May 28 2012

GOODREADS DESCRIPTION

Determined to end a long dry spell, Tina is thwarted by her best friend, Des, who scares off the only eligible guy at their party. But Des more than makes up for it when she and her boyfriend, Josh, invite Tina to their own intimate celebration. The encounter awakens cravings Tina didn't even know she had. She's intrigued when the couple asks her to join them for two days of sun, sand and steamy sex in Santa Barbara. She should say no. But she doesn't...

The erotic weekend is beyond amazing. But there's something deeper developing between the trio-something Tina is not yet ready to explore. After all, their party of three can't last forever-can it?

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I requested Party of Three back when we decided to do these sexy Saturday posts. I think the thing that drew me to it was the whole threesome aspect. Now, I have never aspired to have one myself, but I have had a few friends experience it… so why not read about it.

First off, I’ll admit some parts were hot. The parts where Tina gets it from Desi’s boyfriend Josh.. Okay yeah, I semi digged it.. But then when Tina starts thinking about Desi’s pussy like it’s a four course meal at a 5 star restaurant. That’s where it kind of lost me in sex appeal. I’ll admit, I have admired my own before. I try to keep it nice, ya know, but it’s never made me hungry.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ll be the first to quote Katy Perry and say “I’ve kissed a girl and I liked it”, but when it comes down to the hard stuff, I’m for sure straight. If this book was a threesome scenario with two guys and Tina, I think I would have enjoyed it much more.

Texts with Autumn! 

That being said though, I did learn a little more about lesbian sex. I didn’t realize girls could scissor. Who would have thought?


Um, Kenton. What can I say about this guy? What a creeper. There was this whole back story going on. I’m not sure how I felt about it. It was really strange, and I feel like 3 adults can agree to be in a relationship of this kind, without being mixed up in all that weird shit. It took away from the story in my opinion.

I don’t have much experience in reading Erotica. I’m pretty new to the genre. I would love to know if there is a such thing as a normal romantic erotica- and please don’t say 50 shades because there’s nothing romantic about a man beating the shit out of you to compensate for his shit hole childhood. 

This was a quick read. I didn’t love it. I would be stretching to even say I liked it, but it was okay. If you have ever been curious about lesbian sex or the multiple uses of fresh produce, check this one out!

I will leave you with two of my favorite quotes and some images to take with you, should you venture into this book yourself. :) 

“If it’s got a hole in it, we’re in business.”

“He was superb. His cock stood up from his balls, jerking around as if sniffing out pussy. Or pussies.”

Forever Changed Scavenger Hunt + Giveaway

Today on the bloggy blog I have an excerpt from Tiffany King's new book. I have only read one other book by her, Wishing For Someday Soon. That book really touched me deeply... in a none perverted way. So I cannot wait to get my hands on this one.


I have an excerpt and giveaway for you. Please forgive me, but I have never hosted one of these hunts before, so I'm really just winging it.


To be entered for an E-copy of this book and a Sterling Silver Drumstick charm just comment below with your email. To enter the grand prize over on Tiffany's blog, just head on over with the highlighted letters. Links to other posts and a list of the goodies you can win are there! Click Here! Good Luck! 



“I HATE YOU!” she yelled, standing to her feet.


“I know,” I said again, feeling like my heart was been dragged across hot coals.


She was shaking from head to toe as she jerked her bag up off the seat next her.


“Why didn’t you stop him from driving that day? You had to know he was drinking.”


I nodded my head, acknowledging her words.


“Then why? Why would you let him risk other people's lives like that?”


“You think I don’t regret it? That I wish I would have provoked him, made him take his anger out on me before passing out on the couch like he had so many times before that? It wouldn’t have taken much. One word from me would have set him off, but I didn’t, and I can’t change that now,” I said, furious at myself.

Happy Birthday Andrea!!

Tomorrow is Andrea's Birthday. I met miss Andrea about a year ago. I started following her blog which is nothing short of awesome -----> The Bookish Babe . She is one of the sweetest girls ever. We got to talking one day, and it turned out we have so much in common. I love her dearly, over this year we have formed a true life lasting friendship. She is the first blogger I really opened up to. Lets just say, she's wonderful! 


Not only has she suckered me into loving her, she has suckered many others! lol. Two of which would be Jess and Autumn. The four of us are Pee's in a Pod together. So for Andrea's Big Day, we decided to embarrass the hell out of ourselves. 


Love you Andrea! Hope your day is the best! 

Sexy Summer Saturday's 6/2 : Fifty Shades Darker by E.L. James - Review

Sexy Summer Saturdays is a weekly post that Attack the Stacks, Book Love, Hackaroos Reviews, Sims-Sational Books, The Autumn Review, and The Bookish Babe created for fun, to spread the word about sizzling summer reads.


Be sure to check out al these other reviews by my lovely ladies. I can't promise there's will be as obscene as mine. lol. 


Oh and I should probably mention that this is an erotica book, if you don't already know this, it might be a good idea to get your head out of your ass. 


Enjoy!

Daunted by the singular sexual tastes and dark secrets of the beautiful, tormented young entrepreneur Christian Grey, Anastasia Steele has broken off their relationship to start a new career with a Seattle publishing house.

But desire for Christian still dominates her every waking thought, and when he proposes a new arrangement, Anastasia cannot resist. They rekindle their searing sensual affair, and Anastasia learns more about the harrowing past of her damaged, driven and demanding Fifty Shades.

While Christian wrestles with his inner demons, Anastasia must confront the anger and envy of the women who came before her, and make the most important decision of her life.

Welcome to my first Sexy Summer Saturday post. I figured I would start it off with a couple hundred bangs and review Fifty Shades Darker this week. So I’m just going to get right to it.

I was planning on borrowing this after reading the first, but they are no longer lendable on kindle. Of course they aren’t. So I forked up the $9.99 and bought it. Let’s face it, I’m no better than any other woman in the world, my curiosity has gotten the best of me… again.

Surprisingly, I actually liked this one a little better than the first. Not much, but a little. Here is why…

-         There seemed to be a bit more plot. You know, like a story line to go along with some of the sex.

-         Christian’s childhood issues are explained in much more detail. It made some of his actions in book one make a little more sense. (making sense does not = acceptable btw)

-         The editing seemed a little better. More in the lines of spelling errors. I did not notice as many.

Here are some things that didn’t change.

-         Christian’s state of arousal and Ana’s readiness. I swear that woman’s panties are drenched 24-7 and if you ask me, that is not healthy. She’s going to get trench twat if she doesn’t learn to keep that shit dry. *shudders*

-         The sex! Constant sex that always ends in earth shattering coming undone orgasms, littered with “Holy Fucks, Holy Craps, and Oh My’s” galore.

-         Ana once again wears the plum dress. That thing is played out by now, don’t ya think? Not once has washing it been mentioned.

Let’s just talk about the sex for a minute. The sex in book two didn’t seem as creepy as it did in the first book. There is a lot of vanilla sex (literally) and love making going on. In a fantasy or porn making world, people have this much sex. If I were to have this much sex, no doubt my “down there” would fall right the fuck off or be unrecognizable. (The image of ground hamburger comes to mind) For most of this book they use condoms. Have you ever had sex with a condom? Try doing it multiple times a day, then go take a piss. That shit will burn like hell. I’m not saying it’s impossible to have this much sex. After all, some people make a career out of it, so who am I to say?

They do get into some Kinky Fuckery, so have no fear. They just work their way up to it, and its mild compared to what Christian is used to. You see, he is a changed man. *cue the corny angel descending from heaven music* Yes, this mousy drip of a woman has changed him. In a matter of days, her magical vagina has changed his whole perspective on life. Forgive me if I don’t believe that’s possible. I get it… changing a man, every women’s fantasy. If he is really 50 shades of fucked up, then no women and probably not even therapy is going to change that. If you have read the book, you know the dilly O as to why Christian really is the way he is and why he takes on submissives. This is some deep shit. I would have run like hell! Alas, I have a back bone so that’s to be expected.

My much loved Inner Goddess was still around. She didn’t annoy me as much this time. I don’t know if I just learned to ignore her or if there was less of her. Regardless I highlighted some of my favorites to share with you all. :0)

-         My inner goddess performs a quick arabesque

-         My inner goddess is draped in a pink feather boa and diamonds, strutting her stuff in fuck-me shoes.

-         My inner goddess is on her knees, naked except for her panties – begging.

-         My inner goddess performs four arabesques and a pas de basque.

So I had to Google arabesque, since this inner goddess is so fond of doing them. I’m a little confused. I thought for sure it was some kind of rare figure skating move. Shows what I know.

Before I wrap this up I want to touch on this quote from Ana.

“Could I ever leave him again – no matter what he did to me? Could I betray him like that? No. I don’t think I could. “

That line really bothers me. What exactly does she mean, “no matter what he did to me?” This quote crossed the line for me. Do I think Christian would beat her senseless if she didn’t permit it? No, however, that quote I feel sends a bad message. Yes, I know this is just a book about fucking, and it’s not exactly meant to hand out life lessons, but I’ve seen too many women get caught up in abusive relationships and do nothing about it. It’s not okay to stay with someone who hurts you in any way. I don’t care how big his dick is or what he’s been through, whether you have children together or you just plain love him. I’m all about making some sacrifices in a relationship but I would never sacrifice myself and my happiness. I have a daughter, if she ever came and told me something like that about a boy she wanted to be with, I’d be mortified. That seriously scares the shit out of me. Maybe I’m more heated about the whole thing, having been in a semi abusive relationship before. It happens to the best of us ladies, but some of us are smart enough to recognize and get the hell out of dodge.

Ana is wishy washy to me. One minute she’s a spit fire, standing up for herself when she isn’t hungry, or wants to drive somewhere by herself, but then she goes and thinks stuff like that, and I want to puke.

If you read book one and you liked it, I would recommend you read this one. If you read book one and you didn’t like it, I would still recommend reading it for entertainment alone. LoL. Seriously, the birthday present. Classic. I might offer this to Brian someday too if I ever get up the nerve and give myself an enema first.

For those wondering, there will be a Sims Trailer for Fifty Shades Darker. I’m currently working on it now, I had hoped to have it done before I posted this, but I had other projects to get done. It should be done within the next couple weeks. Yay! If you haven’t seen the Trailer for Fifty Shades of Grey yet, I will post it below! Now I will once again leave you with a few of my favorite one liners.

“Whoa! He has a hotline to my groin.” Really? lol

“This is the butt drawer?” – Bahahaha!

“Arrgh! Please!” I beg – Nice to see she’s still sporting the eye patch.

“I’ve taken my panties off and everything. I feel like a child who has been denied candy” – Did someone say Cock Candy!!!

“I roll my head, giving Christian better access to my neck and push my breasts into his magical hands.” – When I read that, I seriously imagined Harry Potter and Ginny doing dirty things with his wand. I have issues.

EDIT!! It's done... Enjoy!

Awwwe, they look so cute together. lol